myface. twatter. freemail. lolz.

We live in an age when business partners can be in the four corners of the world and hold a live time video meeting by phone. Society learns of news within seconds of it happening thanks to the internet. People you never even liked in high school can request your friendship and effortlessly plunder through your pictures, friends, and comments on their lunch break. (Is that a back handed compliment that the stuck up girl now is nosey enough to want to know your business? Hrm.) Isn’t it lovely to end your evening with paparazzi photos and the latest Hollywood gossip- makes your life seem a lil better, no? The way we communicate has drastically changed and perhaps it is necessary to share some common etiquette with those who are uninformed. Alas, welcome to the 21^st century!

Message importance

If you have anything to convey to someone that is of any importance, do not depend on anything electronic!! In a business setting its nice to have the security of email, because you know the other person got it… but intrapersonal things deserve a phone call or face to face. Under no circumstances should email/twitter/facebook/myspace/etc be used for the following: terminating a relationship (business or personal), flaking/changing plans, announcing pregnancy/death/std, expressing any worthwhile emotion (love/hate/indifference) … I know it’s the easiest way to convey bad news as you get out of having to deal with the backlash, but its bad news. Grow some balls and deal with it.

TMI

Just because we have the ability to share our lives with the world at large via the social networking sites doesn’t mean we should. In fact, it’s kind of dangerous to tell the world when and where you’re doing everything. Sharing personal jokes and innuendos between friends is fun, but we don’t need to know you were having your pipes cleaned last night by the local plumber. Especially when you’re friends with your friend’s parents, your aunt Bea and your supervisor at work. The later will figure it out anyway when you spend your morning texting your girls the depraved details.

Group emails

This can be the most frustrating thing. My favorite is when someone jumps in the thread about 8 emails in to it. Better yet when you get a private email from someone in the thread and it wasn’t meant for you- or vice versa. Ohh snap. Exercise caution and pay attention to detail. And don’t worry; someone is always ‘the bitch’ in a group email thread. Guilty as charged.

Invitations

Its bomb that we can save the texts and the paper invites to send out an evite to get the word out about your next costume-pool-wine & cheese-masquerade kegger. Don’t get butt hurt when not everyone doesn’t open your evite right away or doesn’t rsvp. Good lord there are more important things to do. Though it may be a courtesy to do so, as a host(ess) you should care enough about your guests to call everyone as a friendly reminder. If you can’t do that then you don’t really care that much. It’s unfair to think that if you sent an invitation via smoke signals that the recipient would do the same.

Attention Whoring (also known as 'the John Mayer')

Pictures of you in various states on undress, usually in front of the bathroom mirror. You tube videos of yourself lip syncing to Beyonce songs. Declaring that you are so ugly and stupid in hopes you’ll get rebuttals to make yourself feel better. Responding to every single post by your friends in hopes for some acknowledgment. Posting 50 blurry pictures of the same thing. There’s plenty of places to get reciprocated attention on the interwebs- there is some web site for people who want you. But just throwing yourself out there is like standing on a corner with a sandwich board that says “pay attention to me.” You may get some looks but…. Sad face.

The internet can be an appropriate place to express yourself but think about what exactly you’re putting out there. If you have something to say someone that is important enough to you to get upset about, turn off the computer. Call them. The moment you hook-up don’t rush to change your relationship status. Wait until you flush the jimmy hat down the toilet. In this era of easy electronic communication don’t forget the necessary human element… it will save you a bunch of butt hurt and misunderstandings.